This Is A Bad Game And You Should Feel Bad

[Wranger]

Every time I look down my Steam Library and I see this mound of diarrhoea masquerading as a game, I'm reminded of a more naïve time in my past.

Flashback to about a year ago, and I'm just hearing about Dungeons for the first time, in the form of an interview with some shameless Kalypso marketing ♥♥♥♥♥. The very first line went something like this:

Interviewer: "So, what can you tell me about Dungeons?"
Kalypso: "OK well...you know Dungeon Keeper?"
Interviewr: "Yes?"
Kalypso: *Sheepishly* "Well it's nothing like that."

"Nothing like that" was exactly right, but I know you calculated this perfectly, Kalypso, and I will actually give you credit for a good manipulation. You deliberately planted the idea in our minds. Why mention it if it's nothing like Dungeon Keeper?

Shameless marketing ploy.

Because my immediate reaction was "Oh, that's cute, they're making a spiritual sequel to Dungeon Keeper, but they're a little embarrassed about it and don't want to be seen as ripping it off".

So I bought it, like the gullible moron I was, and now this game is a permanent reminder to myself to never buy a game without playing it first. Think about what that means when there's no demo.

So now, every time a game comes out that I'm interested in, I'm forced to not buy it until I've played a *cough* free version at my *cough* friend's house.

I will curse you with my dying breath, Kalypso, you implied a promise of Dungeon Keeper 3, but all you did was steal my money and my innocence.

[thewookie]

The moral of a story you have a opinion. You bought a game before trying it and made yourself look like a moron. I purchase this game at 10$ which is a steal for am ok game like this.

[AForgottenTome]

I really don't understand why people hate this game so much. I for one enjoy it for what it is, not for what it is not.

[revel911]

I really don't understand why people hate this game so much. I for one enjoy it for what it is, not for what it is not.

IT probably is an okay game, but people like myself who just really wanted Dungeon Keeper 3 or something close enough felt SO disappointed. It's our faults for comparing it to one of the best RTS's of all time!

I can not curse EA enough for buying Bullfrog! At least for me, the Overlord series was new rendition of Dungeon Keeper. Different play style, but the exact same humor and evilness!

[jnecros]

Hey OP! Get out your wallet man, time to preorder Dungeons The Dark Lord!

[RaranTroff]

Hey OP! Get out your wallet man, time to preorder Dungeons The Dark Lord!

I don't think anyone but the 5 people that currently play the game are going to buy that one let alone preorder it. lol

[BarrytheChopper]

I don't think anyone but the 5 people that currently play the game are going to buy that one let alone preorder it. lol

Who would be insane enough to pre-order a Kalypso game?

[Chiatroll]

it's just after all the evil is good talk the game has a monotonous pattern develop where I babysit hero after hero instead of actually feeling evil. You get the machine working and you don't do much with the game

[vagan]

i think the OP is contradicting himself.they said its "not like dungeon keeper" in that interview and yet he maintained his wishful thinking and even bought the game just to flame it and accuse kalypso for false advertisement. check your circuits man.you don´t make any sense at all.

i like dungeons.its not an great game,but sure an good one in my book.i got it on sale and i´m throughly happy with it.

[Wranger]

You either didn't read my post, or read it and didn't understand all the big words I used. Sorry.

[RavN]

I hate this game because it has the most ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ concept ever. Someone apparently thought that babysitting and "fattening" heroes was a fun enough concept to base a $40 game on. Its also buggy, not tactical or strategic, repetetive and the advertising for the game was a blatent ploy.

[YukoValis]

I really don't understand why people hate this game so much. I for one enjoy it for what it is, not for what it is not.

let me see if I can explain it a little. Dungeon keeper 2 was glorious, this game is a bad knock-off. You might say "hey it still works and I'm enjoying the knock-off" but many who have played the original will hate this game. Needlessly sometimes I am sure, but hate nontheless.

[snrooster]

I can honestly say I have never played any of the Dungeon Keeper games. So, when I pre-purchased this game I wasn't expecting anything but what I had read of it's description on the Steam store page. It sounds good, sounded like fun. It is ----! It was nothing like the description. And,as it's it stability. It's like a live Volcano. My pc can run most games with no problems. Not this one. Kalypso made a bad blunder. Which is a shame, cause the Tropico games are awsome.

[w00d]

well lesson learnt.

Just remember the old adage, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.

[Dethstar]

Forget the gameplay for a second. Regardless of if we got the game we were hoping for or not. What I would expect as an absolute minimum, was a game that works.

Right now I am playing it on one of 2 machines which is both pretty hard to top in terms of hardware. But although its smooth, performance isnt great but worst of all. I am getting the game crash to desktop crash reports faily regularly. All in all getting through the last levels is more like endurance than fun.

I am wondering if it doesn like the fact its on my storage drives rather than the boot SSD but I dont see the same issue with anything else. Even crashes when I am trying to save which is appalling.

I actually avoided buying any other kalpso games since I bought this due to the poor quality. I actually think the game itself is ok. Its the poor quality of the product with the crashes etc that I find intolerable. I quite liked the Tropico series but I didnt buy T4 for the reason its made by these guys. Will wait until I know for sure it works.

[clad iron]

shamefur dispray kalipso

[Wranger]

*Karypso

[Nielzie]

Trolls are wandering around these Dungeons everywhere.

Close the Gates!

[Wranger]

*Wandering

[Nielzie]

*Wandering

Fixed!

[Best_Pope_Ever]

Terrible game.

[W1zzard]

I actually avoided buying any other kalpso games since I bought this due to the poor quality. I actually think the game itself is ok. Its the poor quality of the product with the crashes etc that I find intolerable. I quite liked the Tropico series but I didnt buy T4 for the reason its made by these guys. Will wait until I know for sure it works.

Being a fan of Patrician series I bought Patrician IV without a hint of doubt, as a result I still play Patrician III.
When dungeons came out I played the demo and I am still cursing these guys which, at least, Im doing for free (And now Patrician IV seems much much better).
Lets hope they dont screw up the Jagged Alliance series as well

[Askjosh]

agreed Dungeons never should have been made

[Best_Pope_Ever]

agreed Dungeons never should have been made

at least not by this 3rd string developer company.

[Gordo the G]

Yeah, whos aborted brain child was it to think that running a candy land theme park for heros was evil?

Theres just so much wrong with this game without even commenting on the whole marketing hype directed at dugeon keepr fans.

1. It was made by a group of people with zero creative abiliy.

The goblin helper and dugeon lord... rip off of Overlord... even down to the way the goblin talks...

The Dungeons and the goblin builders ... dungeon keepers, dungeon build system and imps...

The play style.... Theme Park... Theme hospital or some or semi limp wristed "sims" style game like that...

2. Full of bugs on release.

Lots of people couldn't even get it to launch.

Other experienced recurring crashing issues.... some STILL ARE...

The mouths of the characters didn't even move...

Somtimes there feet wouldn't move and you would just see them floating around the dungeon.

Lots and lots of other little glitches... TOOK FOREVER to fix some of the major issues....

3. Unjustified high price tag...

For the ammount this game is charging... you could buy... the witcher 2... mass effect 2... actually any game that is a gazillion times better...

....and yes i have bought those other games and my point is that their price fairly reprisents the quality of the game, whilst the price of dungeons does not.

Leading many people to believe (before the demo was released) that it could compete in this price range... it has not... it was huge let down as the dramatic drop in the meta score a few weeks after release reprisented.

Unless you have very very low expectations of what to expect for £30 (like some of the airconditioned youths above) YOU WILL FEEL RIPPED OFF.

[Wranger]

+rep, Gordo.

[Pelvis]

I never played dungeon keeper,and i can say this game is bad on its own...i payed almost 50 euro to dress up dungeons with "prestige items"..??

what a boring game..

i should have known when i saw the name "kalypso"

[Dedlok]

Every time I look down my Steam Library and I see this mound of diarrhoea masquerading as a game, I'm reminded of a more naïve time in my past.

Flashback to about a year ago, and I'm just hearing about Dungeons for the first time, in the form of an interview with some shameless Kalypso marketing ♥♥♥♥♥. The very first line went something like this:

Interviewer: "So, what can you tell me about Dungeons?"
Kalypso: "OK well...you know Dungeon Keeper?"
Interviewr: "Yes?"
Kalypso: *Sheepishly* "Well it's nothing like that."

"Nothing like that" was exactly right, but I know you calculated this perfectly, Kalypso, and I will actually give you credit for a good manipulation. You deliberately planted the idea in our minds. Why mention it if it's nothing like Dungeon Keeper?

Shameless marketing ploy.

Because my immediate reaction was "Oh, that's cute, they're making a spiritual sequel to Dungeon Keeper, but they're a little embarrassed about it and don't want to be seen as ripping it off".

So I bought it, like the gullible moron I was, and now this game is a permanent reminder to myself to never buy a game without playing it first. Think about what that means when there's no demo.

So now, every time a game comes out that I'm interested in, I'm forced to not buy it until I've played a *cough* free version at my *cough* friend's house.

I will curse you with my dying breath, Kalypso, you implied a promise of Dungeon Keeper 3, but all you did was steal my money and my innocence.

So you're saying they "purposefully" decieved you into thinking that this game was going to be like or better than Dungeon Keeper by stating right off the bat that this game isn't like Dungeon Keeper at all...

You've got no one else but yourself to blame for that quite frankly. You totally misread and misconstrued a statement and made a judgement upon your misunderstood assumption. That thought never even crossed my mind even outside of the context of the rest of the interview until you stated as such and even then I was like "Um... No..."

So no one at Kalypso misled you. You misled yourself.

[Gvyse]

i was misled that i get a working fun game...