The official TF2 wish-granting thread

[kevin32]

Hello. I'm a wish-granter. I grant wishes. People wish for things, and I grant them. And I grant things that people wish for. But I'm not some leprechaun or fairy that grants any wish. I only grant wishes that I find reasonable or ideal to the situation. So forget those silly posts demanding Valve to do what you want. I'm a wish-GRANTER. I make stuff happen. In short:

If your wish makes it to this specific list on this specific post, it shall be granted in TF2.


CONDITIONS:

> Up to 100 wishes can make it to the list, with 10 wishes per category.
> Reasonable wishes only. Dream big ("No more crashes!"), but nothing outrageous ("hurr durr, remove the spy class"). Oh yeah, keep it TF2-related.
> Be specific. Don't say "buff X" or "nerf Y". What specific buff/nerf do you want (health, ammo, damage, etc)?
> No wish can be in conflict with (or very similar to) another wish on the list.
> Only 1 wish per person. List as many wishes as you want, in order of preference. If it's unreasonable or in conflict with another wish on the list, then your second wish will be chosen, and so on and yadi ya.


FAQ:

Q: I need ideas for wishes.
A: Check out Humbug's Biggest Update Ever site.

Q: My wish didn't make the list. What gives?
A: "Cry some moar!" Kidding. If your wish was reasonable, then it might have conflicted with another wish already on the list, or it's specific category was full. If your wish did not make the list, then save it, because "The official TF2 wish-granting thread VOL 2" is in the works.


THE WISHLIST

SCOUT

1. The Scout's crazy legs are now available for use in-game. (Nomore1337)
2. The Scout now has a pack based on The Outsiders. (|マｅｄ)
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


SOLDIER

1. The Rocket Jumper now has no damage penalty to Soldier. (Captain M)
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


PYRO

1. The flamethrower now has a 10% damage increase. (Wake123, binarycoder)
2. The Bald Skin Cap is now available. (chaoztheory1)
3. The Pyro is now revealed to be male. (TheKigYarGamer)
4. The detonator has no knockback damage to Pyro. (red40222)
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


DEMO

1. The Team Captain can now be worn by Demo. (Memopirates)
2. Non-Demoknight weapons are now available. (Grobag)
3. Pirate-themed weapons are now available. (Gage)
4. For every Demoknight item released, a Demoman item is released. (cementrio)
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


HEAVY

1. An edible human hand is now available. (stamda)
2. Speed boosts from The Buffalo Steak Sandvich, the GRU, and getting hit by the Disciplinary Action are now stackable. (Lollerskaterz)
3. A Ramen Noodles type item is now available. (sshotz)
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


ENGINEER

1. New buildings are now available, including more powerful sentry guns. (MutantCarrot, binarycoder, cementrio, Pontihog)
2. Shogun promotional items are now available. (Wulfra)
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


MEDIC

1. The Crusader's Crossbow now has passive reload. (Assbandit)
2. Combat-based firearms are now available. (MegaManZer0)
3. The Quick Fix uber can now be stopped by a second alt-fire in order to save the remaining uber. (gf1024)
4. Cosmonaut's needle gun is now available. (MasterKade123)
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


SNIPER

1. The Sydney Sleeper can now extinguish burning teammates. (MiKeV)
2. Additional submachine guns are now available. (F2P Scout)
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


SPY

1. A sapper is now available that turns enemy buildings into friendly ones. (kevin32)
2. The Cinquedea is now available. (Simon >:C)
3. All bugs concerning the Spy are now fixed. (Cronieock)
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.


OTHER

1. TF2 does not crash. (Index...and pretty much any TF2 player.)
2. Profane language and porn sprays are not used in-game. (Mersopolis)
3. Map creators now have additional tools and options for designing single-player TF2 maps. (DrNightKOT)
4. Up to 5 pairs of shades can be worn simultaneously, by any class. (Fatty Corpuscle)
5. Snyphurr has now been gifted the Something Special For Someone Special. (Snyphurr)
6. All old game promotional items are now available via drop/craft/store. (Tigerdude510)
7. The Civilian and compatible missions are now available. (mariobro123587)
8. The Demoman and Soldier now have a renewed friendship. (Clevinger)
9. Multiple cosmetic items can be worn without clipping issues. (itchylol742)
10.

[Assbandit]

I wish the Crusader's Crossbow had a passive reload.

I wish the Enforcer was nerfed.

I wish the Phlogistinator was nerfed to hell.

I wish I could wish for more than one thing at a time.

[demomanby heart]

I wish there was a sniper and spy cap on all servers

[Nomore1337]

i wish the engineer could set a jag dispenser so everyone could jag whack.

i wish the scout could get his crazy legs again.

i wish the ETF2L heavy face could be used as a mask.

i wish the demoman could get some explosive weapons.

i wish my minigun chew'd more gum

[Munkyman720]

Originally Posted by Nomore1337

i wish the scout could get his crazy legs again.

5this

[AlphaPenguin]

I wish that no wishes will be fulfilled. including this one.

[joke33]

Originally Posted by AlphaPenguin

I wish that no wishes will be fulfilled. including this one.

BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaa

Ontopic:
I wish Dead ringer had an actual drawback.

[Memopirates]

i wish that the pyro be a more a respectable class in a way that it no longer relies on Destinguisher or backburner to get kills

I want the axestingisher balanced and i want the cool music from the 3rd degree to be applied to the fire axe

I want the team captian to be able to be worn by the demo

[stamda]

I wish the Heavy got a human hand edible

[Mcfan2]

I wish the Phlogistinator was buffed.

[sandman9601]

I wish reflected rockets went through teammates for a short distance, like they do when Soldier first fires them.

[Erfly]

I wish all reskins except achievement ones (alien swarm, poker night, spacechem etc.) would drop.
I would finally get a big kill!

[SgtFrog]

I wish you wouldn't grant this wish.

WHAT THE FU-BOOOOOOOOM!

On topic: I wish Pyro had a defense/support-oriented flamethrower.

[Dinoman96]

I wish the Heavy wasn't so broken.

[Simon >:C]

I wish I could aim with hitscan weapons.

I wish Spy would get a cinquedea.

I wish Sniper could get another bow.