Spoonerize an item, give it stats.

Kozmo · 08-05-2012, 09:16 PM

For those of you that don't know, a spoonerism is switching the first letter/sound of two words. For example, the spoonerization of Team Fortress would be Feam Tortress. It can also be done with syllables of a single word.

In this thread, simply choose an item, spoonerize it, and give it stats based on its new name.
Inb4 people mock this thread by spoonerizing alliterative items.
Example:

The Chollilop (Lollichop)
Level 5 Axe
+50% chance to lop chollies
-50% chance to have any idea what chollies are or if you want to lop them

I recommend against spoonerizing the Blutsauger or the Red-Tape Recorder. Let's just... not go there.

PutinSpencer · 08-05-2012, 09:17 PM

Hottish Scandshake

+90% chance of Nessie being discovered
-100% chance of Nessie being anything interesting or important

Its the perfect sidegrade to:

Bumpy Scrottle
10% chance of finding nessie
70% chance of nessie being something cool and interesting

XYTWO · 08-05-2012, 09:18 PM

The Bamily Fusiness
+100% explosions
+50% fussiness

stamda · 08-05-2012, 09:20 PM

The Bass Breast
HOLY HELL BOOB WUBS
Doesn't play any actually good dubstep

lolzorz · 08-05-2012, 09:25 PM

The Glare Fun
Is very very fun
Screen glare sucks

zapmunk · 08-05-2012, 09:40 PM

The Locket Rauncher
On hit locket: Make it raunchy

Rynjin · 08-05-2012, 09:42 PM

The Konniver's Cunai

On backstab: The word "FATALITY!" is played to the entire server and the enemy gibs.

...Want.

Pumpkinbot · 08-05-2012, 09:50 PM

The Seserve Rooter
Level 1 Thing Or Something
All friendly Seserves around the user take 40% less damage
Wearer must remain still to root for Seserves

Now we need to find out what these Seserves are and if they are a good enough tank to make that damage reduction worth it.

tastified · 08-05-2012, 09:52 PM

Mid Malk

Summons Julian Smith

No but uhh...

Poliday Hunch

+50% Hunch it's Poliday.

ACubeGod · 08-05-2012, 09:54 PM

The Fuick-Qix

Fuicks those Qixs very fuickly.

GammaJK · 08-05-2012, 09:56 PM

I need to learn how to do color text on these forums
test

MarisaK · 08-05-2012, 09:57 PM

The Lickybomb Stauncher
Fires Lickitungs that explode upon licking
Lickitungs staunchly refuse to stick to anything

The Riper Sniffle
Alt-fire allows Sniper to sniff teammates which reveals hidden Spies
You have to smell the mercenaries

The Thame Flower
Allows player to swim through the River Thames at 400% speed
The River Thames is not actually in Team Fortress 2
No random critical hits

Rynjin · 08-05-2012, 09:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GammaJK

I need to learn how to do color text on these forums

[.color="Color"]<Text>[/color]

Yes, the parentheses ARE necessary.

Remove the period from in front of color.

Also, apparently "ColorName" gives the Purple color.

Explosive Laser · 08-05-2012, 09:59 PM

The Locket Rauncher
Ammo replaced by lockets containing smut
-100% Dignity

T3HK4T · 08-05-2012, 09:59 PM

Ted-(R)ape Recorder

Level 69 Sapper?

100% Chance for OP to hate you
50% Chance to find Scout's Mother
50% Chance to find a female Heavy
Suddenly, You're Ted.

08-05-2012, 09:16 PM	#1
Kozmo Join Date: May 2009 Reputation: 849 Posts: 3,719	Spoonerize an item, give it stats. For those of you that don't know, a spoonerism is switching the first letter/sound of two words. For example, the spoonerization of Team Fortress would be Feam Tortress. It can also be done with syllables of a single word. In this thread, simply choose an item, spoonerize it, and give it stats based on its new name. Inb4 people mock this thread by spoonerizing alliterative items. Example: The Chollilop (Lollichop) Level 5 Axe +50% chance to lop chollies -50% chance to have any idea what chollies are or if you want to lop them I recommend against spoonerizing the Blutsauger or the Red-Tape Recorder. Let's just... not go there. Last edited by Kozmo: 08-05-2012 at 09:36 PM.

08-05-2012, 09:17 PM	#2
PutinSpencer Join Date: Jul 2012 Reputation: 959 Posts: 3,357	Hottish Scandshake +90% chance of Nessie being discovered -100% chance of Nessie being anything interesting or important Its the perfect sidegrade to: Bumpy Scrottle 10% chance of finding nessie 70% chance of nessie being something cool and interesting Last edited by PutinSpencer: 08-05-2012 at 09:20 PM.

08-05-2012, 09:56 PM	#11
GammaJK Join Date: Jun 2011 Reputation: 19 Posts: 342	I need to learn how to do color text on these forums test Last edited by GammaJK: 08-05-2012 at 10:00 PM.

08-05-2012, 09:59 PM	#15
T3HK4T Join Date: May 2010 Reputation: 19 Posts: 296	Ted-(R)ape Recorder Level 69 Sapper? 100% Chance for OP to hate you 50% Chance to find Scout's Mother 50% Chance to find a female Heavy Suddenly, You're Ted. Last edited by T3HK4T: 08-05-2012 at 10:04 PM.

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08-05-2012, 09:18 PM	#3
XYTWO Join Date: Aug 2011 Reputation: 510 Posts: 1,917	The Bamily Fusiness +100% explosions +50% fussiness

08-05-2012, 09:20 PM	#4
stamda Join Date: Dec 2008 Reputation: 3898 Posts: 7,905	The Bass Breast HOLY HELL BOOB WUBS Doesn't play any actually good dubstep

08-05-2012, 09:25 PM	#5
lolzorz Join Date: Sep 2010 Reputation: 439 Posts: 2,867	The Glare Fun Is very very fun Screen glare sucks

08-05-2012, 09:40 PM	#6
zapmunk Join Date: Dec 2009 Reputation: 247 Posts: 1,081	The Locket Rauncher On hit locket: Make it raunchy

08-05-2012, 09:42 PM	#7
Rynjin Join Date: Aug 2011 Reputation: 2278 Posts: 12,835	The Konniver's Cunai On backstab: The word "FATALITY!" is played to the entire server and the enemy gibs. ...Want.

08-05-2012, 09:50 PM	#8
Pumpkinbot Join Date: Jan 2012 Reputation: 213 Posts: 996	The Seserve Rooter Level 1 Thing Or Something All friendly Seserves around the user take 40% less damage Wearer must remain still to root for Seserves Now we need to find out what these Seserves are and if they are a good enough tank to make that damage reduction worth it.

08-05-2012, 09:52 PM	#9
tastified Join Date: Jun 2012 Reputation: 8 Posts: 36	Mid Malk Summons Julian Smith No but uhh... Poliday Hunch +50% Hunch it's Poliday.

08-05-2012, 09:54 PM	#10
ACubeGod Banned Join Date: Mar 2012 Reputation: 327 Posts: 1,180	The Fuick-Qix Fuicks those Qixs very fuickly.

08-05-2012, 09:57 PM	#12
MarisaK Join Date: Feb 2012 Reputation: 53 Posts: 54	The Lickybomb Stauncher Fires Lickitungs that explode upon licking Lickitungs staunchly refuse to stick to anything The Riper Sniffle Alt-fire allows Sniper to sniff teammates which reveals hidden Spies You have to smell the mercenaries The Thame Flower Allows player to swim through the River Thames at 400% speed The River Thames is not actually in Team Fortress 2 No random critical hits

08-05-2012, 09:59 PM	#14
Explosive Laser Join Date: May 2012 Reputation: 108 Posts: 204	The Locket Rauncher Ammo replaced by lockets containing smut -100% Dignity