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Old 08-05-2012, 09:16 PM   #1
Kozmo
 
Join Date: May 2009
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Spoonerize an item, give it stats.

For those of you that don't know, a spoonerism is switching the first letter/sound of two words. For example, the spoonerization of Team Fortress would be Feam Tortress. It can also be done with syllables of a single word.

In this thread, simply choose an item, spoonerize it, and give it stats based on its new name.
Inb4 people mock this thread by spoonerizing alliterative items.
Example:

The Chollilop (Lollichop)
Level 5 Axe
+50% chance to lop chollies
-50% chance to have any idea what chollies are or if you want to lop them


I recommend against spoonerizing the Blutsauger or the Red-Tape Recorder. Let's just... not go there.

Last edited by Kozmo: 08-05-2012 at 09:36 PM.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:17 PM   #2
PutinSpencer
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
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Hottish Scandshake

+90% chance of Nessie being discovered
-100% chance of Nessie being anything interesting or important

Its the perfect sidegrade to:

Bumpy Scrottle
10% chance of finding nessie
70% chance of nessie being something cool and interesting

Last edited by PutinSpencer: 08-05-2012 at 09:20 PM.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:18 PM   #3
XYTWO
 
 
 
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The Bamily Fusiness
+100% explosions
+50% fussiness
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:20 PM   #4
stamda
 
 
 
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The Bass Breast
HOLY HELL BOOB WUBS
Doesn't play any actually good dubstep
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:25 PM   #5
lolzorz
 
 
 
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The Glare Fun
Is very very fun
Screen glare sucks
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:40 PM   #6
zapmunk
 
 
 
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The Locket Rauncher
On hit locket: Make it raunchy
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:42 PM   #7
Rynjin
 
 
 
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The Konniver's Cunai

On backstab: The word "FATALITY!" is played to the entire server and the enemy gibs.


...Want.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:50 PM   #8
Pumpkinbot
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
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The Seserve Rooter
Level 1 Thing Or Something
All friendly Seserves around the user take 40% less damage
Wearer must remain still to root for Seserves

Now we need to find out what these Seserves are and if they are a good enough tank to make that damage reduction worth it.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:52 PM   #9
tastified
 
 
 
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Mid Malk

Summons Julian Smith

No but uhh...

Poliday Hunch

+50% Hunch it's Poliday.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:54 PM   #10
ACubeGod
 
 
 
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The Fuick-Qix

Fuicks those Qixs very fuickly.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:56 PM   #11
GammaJK
 
 
 
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I need to learn how to do color text on these forums
test

Last edited by GammaJK: 08-05-2012 at 10:00 PM.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:57 PM   #12
MarisaK
 
 
 
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The Lickybomb Stauncher
Fires Lickitungs that explode upon licking
Lickitungs staunchly refuse to stick to anything

The Riper Sniffle
Alt-fire allows Sniper to sniff teammates which reveals hidden Spies
You have to smell the mercenaries

The Thame Flower
Allows player to swim through the River Thames at 400% speed
The River Thames is not actually in Team Fortress 2
No random critical hits
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:58 PM   #13
Rynjin
 
 
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GammaJK View Post
I need to learn how to do color text on these forums
[.color="Color"]<Text>[/color]

Yes, the parentheses ARE necessary.

Remove the period from in front of color.

Also, apparently "ColorName" gives the Purple color.
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:59 PM   #14
Explosive Laser
 
 
 
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The Locket Rauncher
Ammo replaced by lockets containing smut
-100% Dignity
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Old 08-05-2012, 09:59 PM   #15
T3HK4T
 
 
 
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Ted-(R)ape Recorder

Level 69 Sapper?



100% Chance for OP to hate you
50% Chance to find Scout's Mother
50% Chance to find a female Heavy
Suddenly, You're Ted.

Last edited by T3HK4T: 08-05-2012 at 10:04 PM.
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